From experience it feels like I have freedom to choose the path of light or path of suffering. I have chosen the path of suffering over and over again, even though in my heart I knew it wasn’t what I truly desired. The more I study Kabbalah the more I think that my view of freedom may be skewed. If we are all a thought of the creator then perhaps all impulses towards the path of light or suffering come from the creator.
What inspired me: Learning of the reshimot and that there is a path back to the creator
What have I learned about myself: That at my core I have the deepest longing to receive and give love, which I assigned to others but it was really a longing for the creator.
What do i wish for my fellow students: to achieve equivalence of from with the creator